{"id":837,"date":"2019-08-04T11:12:18","date_gmt":"2019-08-04T16:12:18","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lfsmusings.com\/?p=837"},"modified":"2019-08-04T11:12:18","modified_gmt":"2019-08-04T16:12:18","slug":"i-did-nothing-wrong","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lillyfei.com\/index.php\/2019\/08\/04\/i-did-nothing-wrong\/","title":{"rendered":"I did nothing wrong."},"content":{"rendered":"\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"aligncenter size-large\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lfsmusings.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/pexels-photo-1161268.jpeg?ssl=1\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-843\" \/><figcaption>Photo by Juan Pablo Arenas on <a href=\"https:\/\/www.pexels.com\/photo\/adult-black-and-white-darkness-face-1161268\/\" rel=\"nofollow\">Pexels.com<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p>I feel like a fool. I was that typical engaged girl. Showing off my ring. Documenting every wedding planning step. Pretending to be shy whenever anyone asked me about my engagement, but really I wanted to never stop talking about it. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I&#8217;m sure I annoyed everyone who followed me on social media. Don&#8217;t lie. We&#8217;ve all been there. Scrolling on our phones and thinking, <em>Ugh did they really just post another wedding photo?<\/em> <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I feel like a fool for playing into all of it. For doing the same thing. And then for having no wedding, no husband, no new life to show for it. It wasn&#8217;t like an engagement got called off with no wedding planned. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The wedding was planned. It was all good to go. Guests were arranging travel plans. We had a wedding shower and received lovely gifts. Gifts that we then offered to pay back because why get a wedding gift is there is no wedding?  <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The only thing worse than what happened would be if he actually left me <strong>at the altar. <\/strong> <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I feel like I&#8217;ve been tricked and led on. I&#8217;m tired of being the gracious one. I&#8217;m tired of being the supportive one with the unconditional love. I was affected too. Sure, he has demons that influenced his actions. That doesn&#8217;t mean he&#8217;s the only one hurt. It doesn&#8217;t mean he was being selfless or the bigger person. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I&#8217;m tired of responsible parties being victimized and made out to be helpless. I&#8217;m tired of people either forcing me to be happy with what&#8217;s happened or treating me like fragile glass. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Yea, I&#8217;m sad. Yea, I&#8217;m furious. Yea, I&#8217;m even happy sometimes. But mostly, I am embarrassed. I don&#8217;t know why. I did nothing wrong. Maybe that is why. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">I did nothing wrong, and this still happened to me. <\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>All social media links are here:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-social-links is-layout-flex wp-block-social-links-is-layout-flex\">\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I feel like a fool. I was that typical engaged girl. Showing off my ring. Documenting every wedding planning step. Pretending to be&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":4363,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[10,14],"tags":[89,158,168,248,524,525],"class_list":["post-837","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-mental-health","category-relationships","tag-anxiety","tag-breakup","tag-cancelled-wedding","tag-depression","tag-relationship","tag-relationship-issues"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>I did nothing wrong. - LillyFei<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Photo by Juan Pablo Arenas on Pexels.com I feel like a fool. 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